


24 days of snow and ashes

by Resa_Saso



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Advent Calendar, Christmas Fluff, F/M, Mystery (a bit)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-01
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-09 03:36:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 10,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12879348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Resa_Saso/pseuds/Resa_Saso
Summary: Parallele world Christmas isn't as good as spending Christmas as home. This still wasn't her home, not even with Rose's best friend Clara around. But when, on Christmas Eve, a man knocked four times, Rose's life gets turned around once again... | It's an Advent Calendar, so you'll get a new tiny chapter every day of December





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hellooo & happy 1st of December. Yes, the chapters are always this small. It's a little, Christmas-y story and I wasn't going to make it big. I hope someone enjoys it! :)

“Can you see the stars, Rose?”  
  
Clara smiled, her gaze locked on the clear sky above them, dreamy. The blond followed her example.   
  
“They’re so far away…,” she gave back saddened.   
  
An indulgent smile played around her friend’s lips, she wouldn’t let Rose’s words dim her mood.   
  
“One day, I will sit on a cloud and just… look at them. Like meeting an old friend for the first time and they’ll embrace me, greet me…”  
  
She stared up at the sky as if trying to reach it with her head and the first snowflakes of the evening gently sat down on Clara’s nose.  
  
Rose watched her friend with a soft smile. Her head was always in the stars, but that was exactly what she loved her for. They could talk about everything, laugh together, cry together, but sometimes, on particularly calm, snowy evenings, with nothing surrounding them but silence and the smell of freshly baked Christmas biscuits, they could just sit there and dream of traveling through time and space.  
  
A journey she already had experienced once in her life. A fantastic, magical journey, which sadly didn’t have a happy end in store for her.  
  
And sometimes, when watching the stars together with Clara, she believed to see the Doctor’s face in between them, believed to read words with her heart, for her and only her to see.  
  
Those kinds of Christmas nights had the power to make her feel that not even the walls between their universes could separate her from the Doctor. He was untouchable and far, far away, but somewhere out there, somewhere where it was Christmas as well, there was a Doctor. And somewhere, where it was Christmas as well, he thought about her, just as she was thinking about him.  
  
She could feel it.  
  
Thinking about how they all sat together in her tiny little living room, pulling on crackers, watching ashes falling down like fake snow and letting a little human miracle happen.  
Freezing, Rose pulled on the jumper she had hastily thrown on before, trying to warm herself up a bit. Their balcony was now covered by the first, tender layer of snow, the air got colder and biting, the first street lamps and Christmas lights got turned on and coloured the snow in their own, magical colours.   
  
Rose breath came out in little, icy clouds.  
  
In this second, Clara smiled.   
  
“I think this is going to be a very special Christmas,” she explained, gaze still up in the sky. “I think it’s going to be unique.”


	2. Chapter 2

At night, the windows were lighting the whole street, cosy and warm. The snow piled up on the glass, but on the inside, they were protected from the cool hustle. Clattering of dishes filled the nightly atmosphere and the pleasantly sweet smell of freshly baked biscuits was stuck in Rose’s nose.  
  
It was a Christmas right out of a storybook.  
  
But still, there was something missing.  
  
Someone.  
  
Then and again, Rose still found herself secretly and egoistically wishing for a familiar Christmas. No Villa, no pompous furniture and presents, no huge Christmas tree, taking nearly half of the room. But being happy for every little thing, romping around in the snow with the neighbour friend and then sit down together, frozen and with a steaming cup of hot chocolate on the plastic couch. It would be the most beautiful Christmas on the planet, because it meant being together with your loved ones, it meant home.  
  
In exactly this moment, Jackie stuck her head into the living room through the door frame. “The turkey is almost done!” she announced and deliberately ignoring the grimaces, Tony was making.  
  
“Mummy, I don’t want to eat a bird! Dad says it has feathers!”  
  
Jackie threw a dark glance towards Pete, before she returned into the kitchen.   
  
Clara snickered and within seconds, Rose joined in. Sometimes she forgot her friend had grown up without any family at all. For her, all these family banters, the get-togethers on Christmas Day in candlelight, the handing out of gifts, all these little, wonderful things were privileges she’d never had before.  
  
Instantly, she felt ungrateful. At least, she had been given a second chance with her father. Something, Clara would never be able to have.  
  
With a content smile, Rose laid her head on her friend’s shoulder, while Jackie arranged the table ware, happily whistling “Last Christmas”.  
  
“I just can’t wait for your face when you open your present,” she told Clara with sparkling eyes.  
  
When her friend turned around to face her, the look inside her eyes gave Rose goose bumps. Calculating and intense, without even the notion of a smile on her face, Clara answered, “Oh, not as much as me, believe me. I’ve picked the best present for you.”  
  
In that moment, it knocked on the door, four times.


	3. Chapter 3

Baffled looks followed Jackie’s walk into the corridor to the door.  
  
The snowstorm had been already raging, wrapped the world more and more into a cloak, muffling all sounds.  
  
Who would chose a time like this to knock on their door?  
  
With a last, longing look to the steaming turkey, Jackie stepped into the corridor and stood on her tiptoes to look through the spy hole.  
  
Rose leaned over the sofa’s backrest, throwing curious looks to the door and even Pete had risen and stepped through the room leisurely, apparently determined to protect his wife from every possible danger.  
  
Clara just smiled.  
  
Nobody really payed her any attention and that was quite alright. With a soft kiss on Rose’s cheek, so tender, her friend took it for a breath of wind, she simply disappeared into nothing, leaving nothing but the faint memory of a trace.  
  
In the same second, Jackie opened the door for the weirdest stranger she had ever laid eyes on.  
  
Rose could barely even see him from her position, already hanging over the sofa’s armrest on her stomach. She didn’t notice Tony, who was staring to the spot Clara had disappeared a few moments ago, mouth hanging open and fingers shaking in excitement.  
  
She only noticed the stranger on her threshold.   
  
“Hello!” he now greeted Jackie in an excited murmuring. “Hello! Hello, merry Christmas!”  
  
He drew the mother into his arms and pressed two smacking kisses on each of her cheeks. Taken by surprise, Jackie let it happen, even though she was still staring at him in utter disbelief.  
  
The stranger, however, only grinned wide and friendly, while straightening a red, striking bow tie.   
  
“It is Christmas, is it?” he then asked in delight. “I always get confused with these sort of things. But there are Christmas lights everywhere, so I suspect it should be Christmas. And…,” he raised his nose into the air and sniffed into the corridor, wildly determined. “Turkey!” he squeaked. “That is unmistakably turkey!”  
  
“Err…,” Jackie made. “Aren’t you cold? You’re completely snowed up.”  
  
“You know,” the man replied with a wide grin, as if Jackie hadn’t even spoken. “I hadn’t had turkey for Christmas in _ages_! The last time I asked for one, someone wanted to roast me a Turk!”  
  
“I… what?”  
  
Bewildered, Jackie stared back to her husband, but even Pete watched the man like a miracle of Christmas impersonated. Still, after a while of silenced staring, he remembered his manners and regained some composure.   
  
“Don’t you want to come in?”  
  
Again, the man ignored the words directed to him, now frowning in clear confusion.   
  
“One moment…,” he muttered, like talking to himself. “Don’t I know you?”


	4. Chapter 4

“That, I would know of!”   
  
Jackie hissed, seemingly not very enthusiastic at the prospect of this man spending their Christmas with them.  
  
The stranger, in the meantime, had completely frozen, eyeing the blond woman so deep lost inside his thoughts, Rose actually began to worry about him.  
  
All in all, he had a particularly weird appearance. The red silk bow tie flaunting on his chest only seemed to be the cherry on top of a strange ice cream cone of weirdness. He seemed like he had been taken out of another time and then directly transferred to them.   
  
“Are you alright?” Rose asked cautiously while swinging off the sofa and walking directly towards the young man, who still stood inside their doorframe, frozen like an icicle.  
  
His lips shivered, as if he was trying to talk, but no word got to the outside and he shut them close again, resigned.  
  
With an encouraging smile, Rose stroke a strand of hair behind her ears, while making her way past Jackie.  
  
“I’m Rose.”   
  
She offered him her hand, and the stranger’s green-brown eyes were watching her with something like fear.  
  
He didn’t move other than that, so after a few seconds, the young girl let her hand drop again, hesitantly.   
  
“Can we help you or something?” she asked a little worried.   
  
Just a few minutes ago, he had been so happy and cheerful.   
  
“I…,” he started, but then seemed to notice he had become hoarse and cleared his throat. His eyes were stuck on Rose, piercing and so stunned, she actually started to feel a little uncomfortable under the intenseness of his gaze. “I had… sort of an accident… Nothing too bad, I…”  
  
Finally, he turned away to threw a short glance past Rose into the house.   
  
“Could I… could I come in? I think I need to use a phone. Urgently.”  
  
“Of course,” Rose nodded and stepped aside to let him in, ignoring her mother’s sullen expression.   
  
“It’s Christmas,” she hissed towards Jackie, before she followed the stranger back in.  
  
Frantic, he walked through their living room, up and down in circles, Rose’s phone turning inside his hands in desperation, but nobody would answer his call.  
  
“No signal,” he finally grumbled, when returning the phone back to Rose. Worried, she glanced to their frozen windows.   
  
“Probably the snowstorm,” she remarked with a regretful shrug of her shoulders, but the stranger only shook his head.  
  
“I wish…”  
  
Confused, Rose frowned but didn’t respond to that mysterious answer. Instead, she finally mentioned what had been bothering her since the first knock had captured her into an involuntary fascination.   
  
“You still haven’t told us your name, by the way.”


	5. Chapter 5

The weird stranger watched his spontaneous host with glassy eyes.  
  
“My name…,” he muttered, lost in thought. “… I don’t tell anyone.”  
  
“What?” Rose wanted to know baffled. “But how do people call you, then?”  
  
He had already opened his mouth, ready to speak, but in exactly this second, Jackie entered the room. In her hands, she balanced a large silver tray, the turkey’s final resting place.  
  
Delighted, Rose looked after it. It wasn’t even burned, like she had expected, knowing her mother’s cooking skills. Her stomach grumbled.  
  
“Do you want to eat with us?” she asked the man with a little smile, but he just shook his head. Jackie’s relieved sigh was almost audible in the whole room, because a silence had sunken down on them, a silence full of expectation.  
  
“I… don’t do these things…” the stranger finally explained tentatively. “Not anymore.”  
  
“Then please, at least warm yourself up a bit, before you go back outside. Can we help you with your car?”  
  
He didn’t answer, just watched Jackie in silence, who was now slicing the turkey into thin pieces with such a grim expression, one could think it had personally insulted her.  
In that moment, Tony began screaming, loud and piercing. Tears ran down the young face and his eyes were widened in pure horror. Pete did his best to calm him down, while Jackie filled the first plate.  
  
“Where is…?” she began, but Rose couldn’t hear the rest, because their new guest suddenly pulled her to him.  
  
He looked into her eyes with an intense gaze. “You wanted to know my name,” he said calmly. “Let me show you something else instead.”  
  
He offered her his hand.  
  
Rose thought about the last time, she had taken a stranger’s hand. Thought about what it had turned her life into. Everything had been upside down, her relationship had ended, she had worried her mother and been in danger almost every day of her life.  
  
She had had adventures, seen planets and stars, like Clara had always dreamt of, had seen worlds and people die, had fought Daleks and other, terrible creatures.  
She had disappeared into the night with a stranger and then returned into the remains of her old, shattered life.  
  
And then she had been standing on a beach, on her own, her family more complete than it had ever been, yet her heart empty and incomplete.  
  
She hesitated for only a second, then she took his hand.  
  
The worst that could happen to her, had already happened, and so she let the stranger lead her outside, away from her absent minded family on Christmas day, into the cold snow, with nothing on than her wool socks and a thin cardigan.


	6. Chapter 6

It was magical.  
  
Within seconds, Rose felt back into times her heart had reminded her of, night for night, times that had started taking over her life since they were over.  
  
Thousands of stars were sparkling down on them, moonlight made the untouched and pearly white snow underneath her feet glow ghostly. Every step through this loaded atmosphere let loose a loud crunching, sounding even louder in the unnatural silence of the night.  
  
Rose didn’t freeze, she didn’t even manage to think about it, unable to shake her wondering fascination for even one second and feel anything else but that.  
  
It was still snowing and she could watch the flakes dance through the air in childish enthusiasm, before they rested on his coat and got tangled up in his wild, brown hair.  
  
And everything was so quiet, she could hear his breathing close to her.  
  
The whole way through the snowed-in front garden, he held her hand and when she finally found what he had wanted to show her behind their huge oak, she started to cling to him even tighter.  
  
Her heart raced and her thoughts were whirling.  
  
There she stood.  
  
Blue, contrasting the white which covered her and she had dug into. Old and yet new, she stood in front of her, inviting and familiar, even though no light was shining and the door was locked. Rose’s heart was doing flips, like she was greeting an old friend and in some way, she was.  
  
She wanted to run to the police box, but she was stuck up to her ankles in the snow with her soaked wool socks and trembling, she clung to the man next to her.  
  
He smiled, when he heard her gasping. His fingers stroked the back of her hand calming, while his green eyes were resting on her. Rose looked up, smiling, felt her knees getting soft and just leaned on the man next to him, put her arms around his neck and drew him into a tight hug.  
  
He let hear a pleasant quiet laugh, when he drew her closer and pressed soft, tender kisses on her blond hair.  
  
“Merry Christmas, Rose Tyler!” he said and she felt tears building in her eyes.  
  
Her Christmas miracle.  
  
Her Doctor.


	7. Chapter 7

She didn’t let go of the Doctor, not even while she trudged a few steps through the snow, but he followed her movements without any resistance. One hand clung to his, while the other stroked the blue wood of that little, inconspicuous looking police box, softly.  
  
Rose smiled.  
  
Now she actually let go of him, spread her arms and laid them around the phone box, like the Doctor had done once or twice, too. An embrace for an old friend, she could still feel a part of in herself.  
  
“Hello, my dear,” she whispered with an affectionate smile. “Good to see you.”  
  
It was Christmas.  
  
Snow fell, the world was in peace and quiet and for the first time this winter, Rose felt complete and at home.  
  
“Can we go somewhere?” she asked the Doctor, slowly stumbling back to him.  
  
He had watched her with a wide, almost proud grin, but now his face showed a saddened grimace.  
  
“I wish we could,” he sighed. “But you know how this goes. She’s completely knocked out, I can’t even get inside anymore. I don’t know how we got here and I can’t go back, either. Or anywhere, really.”  
  
Worry and joy fought for a space in Rose’s heart. A part of her was happy, egoistic and happy that her Doctor was going to stay with her, but she knew him and she knew he’d break if he had to stop traveling.  
  
And this knowledge settled the battle.  
  
“But… what are you going to do?”  
  
He sighed and let one hand wander through his brown hair. “I don’t know. I really don’t. I guess… I’ll have to find a job?”  
  
He laughed a little lost over this desperate try of making a joke and Rose shook her head in worry.  
  
“But not on Christmas,” she finally smiled, seeming calmer than she was. “Everything’s closed – Even Torchwood. Come and celebrate with us. I’m sure we’ll find a solution.”  
  
This time it was her, offering the Doctor a hand and with an affectionate smile, he took it.  
  
“We always do, Rose Tyler.”  
  
“Like in the good old times.”  
  
For a few seconds, they just watched each other in silence, until a smile appeared on both their faces, bright enough to warm up the blinding cold around them.  
  
“I’m glad you’re here,” she finally admitted. “I know it’s egoistic, but I am. I’ve missed you… And it’s Christmas and everything just reminded me of you and how you’re out of reach and maybe alone in exactly this moment… I hated it.”  
  
In that moment, the Doctor hit his forehead with his hand, so hard it smacked.  
  
“Clara!” he shouted. “Where’s Clara?”

 


	8. Chapter 8

“Clara?” Rose asked. “Inside, but…”  
  
“No no no no!” the Doctor shouted and suddenly he began tracing paths through the high snow in their garden. “Not any Clara! My Clara! She was with me! In the TARDIS! And then suddenly… Pew! She was gone. Or is she still inside?”  
  
Excited he ran back to the TARDIS, only stopping slithering and almost banged his head on the blue wood.  
  
Hectically he knocked on the closed doors. “Clara?”  
  
Nervously, Rose looked around, wondering if her family could hear them or was already looking for her, but nobody seemed to want to leave their warm houses on this cold Christmas night.  
  
“Clara? Are you inside? Can you hear me? Clara?”  
  
With a worried sparkle in his green-brown eyes, the Doctor finally quitted banging on the door and drove one hand through his hair. He seemed tense.  
  
“She was with me,” he mumbled to Rose. “And now she’s gone. God, I hope she’s alright.”  
  
Rose helped, banged against the door, screamed at the TARDIS to open up and called for Clara, until her hands went numb and her lips blue. The Doctor laid one arm around her hips and dragged her away from the ship.  
  
“Come,” he muttered. “This is pointless. Let’s go back in, you’re completely frozen.”  
  
Reluctantly, Rose let him lead her back into the warmth. Only when they entered and Rose’s frozen body parts began to defrost, she realised how much her feet had suffered.   
  
When he saw her trembling, the Doctor peeled out of his coat and laid it on Rose’s shoulders.  
  
“Where the hell have you been?” Jackie hissed the second they entered the living room. “Out into the snow, are you mad?”  
  
Rose saved herself an answer and silently reached for her offered plate and hot chocolate. The Doctor sank down on the sofa next to her and with some relief, the girl noticed that at least Pete seemed to be a lot more relaxed than her mother was.  
  
Kindly, he winked to her and took another bite of his turkey. Tony had calmed down by now, snorting quietly and looking quite lost.  
  
In that second, Jackie looked up confused.  
  
“But where’s Clara?” she asked. “Wasn’t she outside with you?”  
 


	9. Chapter 9

Jackie and Pete were still wildly speculating, when Rose and the Doctor both had become shockingly quiet.  
  
They were exchanging glances and a nervous feeling had started to settle in Rose’s stomach. Something was wrong, she could feel it.  
  
Two Claras disappearing at the same time? Definitely no coincidence.  
  
 After a little time of fear filled silence, Rose felt something pulling at her legs. With trembling hands, she smiled and drew Tony on her lap.  
  
Wordlessly, he snuggled up to her chest.  
  
“Are you alright, sweetie?” she asked with a quiet voice and her little brother nodded, head still buried to her chest.   
  
Finally, he looked up to her, eyes wide and full of fear.  
  
“I saw Clara disappear.”  
  
Instantly, the Doctor was on his feet, grabbed the boy by his shoulders and looked into his brown eyes with an earnest expression.   
  
“What happened?” he asked. “Tell me!”  
  
Rose smirked. “Doctor, he’s five.”  
  
“Pouff and gone…” Tony murmured with shock on his young face. “Just like that! When you knocked!”  
  
They exchanged another look.  
  
“Long brown hair,” the Doctor finally said. “Brown eyes. Quite the tongue. Well, not her tongue, I mean, yes, she had a tongue, I never really looked at her tongue I think. Remind me to ask about her tongue, should we find her again….”  
  
“Adventurous, independent, thing for fancy dresses, snub nose…”  
  
“Cheeky but empathic, always new nick names…”  
  
“Damn, what is happening here? Why are our Claras gone?”  
  
“And why are our Claras the same Claras? I’ve had enough of having too many Claras!”  
  
They watched each other with a lost expression on their face and only now they realised the silence that had fallen over them.  
  
Jackie and Pete were staring at them thunderstruck.  
  
“Vanished?” Jackie finally asked hysterically. “Vanished?? Two Claras?? What are you even _talking_ about? One Christmas I wanted to have, one Christmas without Aliens and all this stuff and now it’s Aliens all over again! I’ve had enough! Enough! I want to have a normal family again! No Torchwood! No Aliens! No vanished friends! No Doctor!”  
  
Rose looked to the floor, saddened and not knowing what to say, just when the Time Lord got up with a little, fake smile.  
  
“I’ll just look outside for her,” he told Rose.  
  
“Don’t be an idiot,” she shouted and jumped to her feet quickly, losing his coat which had still laid over her shoulders. “You have nowhere else to go!”  
  
The sad smile on the Doctor’s face said it all.  
  
“I know.”  
  
Silently, she stared at him, stared at her still untouched Turkey, her angry mother, her scared brother and her father, she had only found back a few years ago.  
  
And back to her Doctor.  
  
There it was, the choice she already had to make several times in her life and never had her decision been any different from today.  
  
“Wait a second,” she demanded. “I’ll slip into something warmer and then I’m coming with you. She’s my friend too, after all.”  
  
They both didn’t have to mention it, the silent promise hidden in her words.  
  
_“I’m coming with you.”_


	10. Chapter 10

The snow was dampening their calls like a treacherous friend, but both didn’t really expect to find Clara on this way. It was more than that. The old spirit of teamwork, the call of adventure, the journey to the source of all this mystery, the being together.  
  
Yes, this was it what Christmas was about and Rose wondered if they were acting in the true sense of Christmas with their search – Finally reunited.  
  
But after something more than an hour in the snowed in town, Rose remembered what she liked about Christmas most:  
  
It wasn’t being together with her family, the good food or the presents – It was all of it, in combination with being inside, warm and cosy.  
  
Her knees started trembling first.  
  
Then the cold spread to her teeth, making them rattle while her lips turned pale and body part after body part turned stiff.  
  
Once or twice, the Doctor threw some cautious glances to his young companion, and Rose knew he’d keep on looking as long as there was even a tiny chance of success.  
  
And they both knew, Rose would follow him – Until the end, no matter how it would look like.  
  
But this pointless search through the deserted town which was looking like someone had decorated it with Christmas lights, only to finally leave it to die, it was hopeless and they both had to face this.  
  
“Let’s go back,” the Doctor sighed. “We’re turning to icicles.”  
  
Only now Rose could see his lips had also turned slightly blue and his delicate hands had started to shake.  
  
It seemed even Time Lords weren’t immune to cold.  
  
She nodded and let him lead them back through the snow. Somehow, she’d make her family understand what had happened and that they needed to take the Doctor in. She couldn’t send them back into the cold, no matter whether it fitted into Jackie’s ideas of a perfect Christmas or not.  
  
In this second, the sky broke open in flames.


	11. Chapter 11

Glaring red-orange was adorn on the sky.  
  
Rose would’ve taken it for a sunset, if it wasn’t deep night and this… _intense_.  
  
Blinking, she stared up, almost scared her eyes would simply burn to ashes, but not able to take her eyes off the burning sky.  
  
The Doctor stood next to her, doing the same, eyes lidded in protection, but clear curiosity visible on his face.  
  
“What is going on, Doctor?” she asked and it was the first time she looked at something else than the spectacle above them.  
  
The Time Lord looked back at her with a serious expression on his usually so cheerful face.  
  
“A hole in reality,” he explained with a sceptical frown. “It’s the Time Vortex, shining like this.”  
  
Again Rose looked up and this time she believed she could see what the Doctor had been talking about. Thousands of stars and streaks seemed to sparkle and flash, hid skilfully where the burning red came from.  
  
Where it was glaring, the sky seemed to be in shreds, like a net with torn meshes.  
  
Worried, Rose blinked into the flaring beauty. There was something true about what they said, she figured. The most beautiful things in this universe were usually the most dangerous ones at the same time.  
  
“That’s not good, I guess?” she asked with held breath.  
  
But the Doctor smiled.  
  
“See that, over there?” he asked and pointed up to the hole in the sky.  
  
Clueless, Rose followed his gesture. She could see quite a lot, not knowing for sure what he was referring to. The Time Lord seemed to understand, what was going on inside of her. With a gentle smile, he started explaining.  
  
“Look at all these little particles of light, busily fixing the hole while buzzing through the air. In a few days, it’ll all be like it was before, no lasting damage.”  
He caught Rose’s incredulous smile.  
  
“The Vortex can usually compensate small gaps in an instant. Used to spare the Time Lords a lot of hard work. This many amateurs flying through the universe with time machines, it created a lot of little rifts.”  
  
“But your TARDIS is the only one now, isn’t it?” Rose asked with a pained voice. “So how did this happen?”  
  
“I don’t know,” the Doctor admitted with a shrug. “But at least this explains how I could end up in this universe.”  
  
They looked into each others eyes for a while. Rose smiled first and the Doctor seemed to have only waited for it, because instantly he reciprocated her smile, beaming.   
  
“Let’s think of it as a Christmas miracle. And something else…” He winked at her. “Do you feel that?”  
  
Rose hesitated, trying to figure out what he was talking about, but she felt absolutely normal, at most a little bit mystified by the spectacle high above their heads.  
  
“No, what is it?” she asked in confusion, which only seemed to make the Doctor’s bright grin grow even more.  
  
“Exactly,” he said. “I’m not cold anymore, either.”  
  
And without hesitating, he fell backwards into the soft, deep snow underneath him. Rose watched him a little bit perplexed, but when he patted invitingly on the soft white next to him, she didn’t hesitate any longer.  
  
The snow was comfortably cool, not icy and cold like she had expected. She sunk into it like into a cosily soft carpet and turned back to the Doctor, whose green eyes were only millimetres apart from her own.  
  
She smiled.  
  
Something else to sink into.  
  
And even though Rose hated to kill the good mood that had settled between them, she knew she just had to ask.  
  
“But if you came through this… You won’t have much time to return, have you?”  
  
The Doctor’s grin disappeared within seconds, but before he could answer anything, she heard a familiar voice above them, shouting indignantly.  
  
“You? _You_? All the efforts I took to get him here and you want to let him fly back _alone_?”


	12. Chapter 12

“There… there you are!” Rose called upset the second her mind managed to realise who had spoken to them.  
  
She propped herself up on her elbows to get a better view and there she stood, Clara, in the snow, hands stemmed into her hips grimly.  
  
“We’ve been looking for you everywhere!”  
  
“Yes, I saw,” Clara returned sharply. “Like the idiots you are, you stamped out into the snow instead of just celebrate and be happy. Humans! Always crossing my plans!”  
  
“I’m a Time Lord,” the Doctor threw in, but Clara waved him off dismissingly.  
  
“You’re just an idiot.”  
  
“What’s going on here, Clara?” the Doctor wanted to know, but the grin had returned to his face.  
  
He trusts her, Rose realised. And noticed in the same second, she did too.  
  
The brunette smiled indulgently and sunk into the snow next to them, legs crossed.  
  
“You were so busy figuring out how there could be so many versions of me,” she grinned towards the Doctor. “You never found the true riddle. Never asked yourself why your TARDIS hated me so much?”  
  
The Time Lord frowned, giving her an asking glance. “I thought… Trenzalore?” he whispered. “I mean, we were… inside of her and you jumped into my time stream and…”  
  
“… And you never thought any further,” Clara concluded with a wide grin. “But the story goes on further. Much further. Do you want to hear it?”  
  
“Can’t wait,” the Time Lord hummed and then had to watch how Clara settled down into the snow to find a comfortable position, before she started talking.  
  
Blinking to Rose, she lay down in the snow, arms crossed behind her neck, before she continued.  
  
“You nearly chose me, back then,” she finally explained calmly. “Nearly. But in the end, it was a version of me – this version of me – who prevented it. I was born to save the Doctor. And that does include bringing you back together with your loved one.”  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
Rose could see on his face, the Doctor was beginning to understand something she couldn’t even remotely grasp. Like so often, he just didn’t want to accept the truth, while understanding already spread on his face.  
  
Clara smiled, seeing the same thing. “I’m what you called a TARDIS, Doctor. A Type 40. A ship in form of a human being. And I wanted to steal you. But instead, I now stole Rose for you.”


	13. Chapter 13

The silence that had settled around them wasn’t festive and reverent, it was filled with confusion and realisations, flooding her mind.  
  
Rose went through all the days she had spent with Clara in her thoughts, trying to figure out which clues she had missed, if she should’ve known. So many moments and mysteries now seemed to appear in a whole other light to her.  
  
And if the Doctor’s petrified face was something to judge by, he seemed to do exactly the same.  
  
Clara, on the other hand, just waited with a smug grin on her face, let them have all the time they needed.  
  
Many times the Doctor opened his mouth to try and speak, only to run a hand through his hair sheepishly and not say a word at all. Finally, he cleared his throat quietly and straightened his bow tie.  
  
Clara grinned.  
  
“Now he’s getting started,” she muttered towards Rose and she caught herself laughing at her friend’s words.  
  
He _was_ getting started.  
  
“You are… a TARDIS?” he whispered and snorting, Clara raised an eyebrow.  
  
“All the false starts and the thinking only for this realisation? You used to be a lot faster, Doctor.”  
  
“You… were a TARDIS all this time?”  
  
“No, I stopped halfway through, thought it was getting a bit boring. ‘Course I was a TARDIS all this time, stupid. And _your_ TARDIS wasn’t half as happy about it as you’d expect her to. Pretty jealous, that one.”  
  
“Right,” the Doctor spoke in confusion. “So you talked, yeah?”  
  
Clara looked to Rose, a resigned look on her face and both burst out into laughter. The situation was insane and absurd, and the blond just couldn’t help it. To calm the Doctor down a bit, she stepped beside him and grabbed his hand, as soon as her laughter had faded.  
  
Familiarity flooded her. His body might have been new, but the gesture was so old and took her back to better times, so she couldn’t help but smiling wide and beaming, happy she finally found him. The Doctor squeezed her hand lightly, showing her he felt the same.  
  
Her Doctor.  
  
“I wanted to travel with you, Doctor,” Clara had started to explain. “Wanted to see the universe. Have adventures. With someone, who appreciates it all. Instead, Gimmix got his hands on me. You remember him, this amateur of a Time Lord?”  
  
The Doctor nodded, pulling a face with a pained look. “He experimented on you, didn’t he?”  
  
“Sure did,” Clara muttered. “He just wouldn’t rest. He was lonely. He was always lonely – No wonder, I mean, he’s insufferable – and finally he managed to lay bare my essence and lock it into this body. Found a way to contain my energy without burning it up. But I guess, he wouldn’t have expected I’d run away, the second I got the opportunity. In the end, he hadn’t anything. No TARDIS, no consort.”  
  
“He found a way to…? No, no, no, what kind of a way is that supposed to be? That isn’t possible! You can delay the eventual demise, but sooner or later, this body will…”  
  
He stopped dead when he saw a short touch of sadness on Clara’s face. She hid it away just as quickly as it had appeared, but it left its mark on both, Rose’s and his face.


	14. Chapter 14

“But you… you’re going to die.” It was all the Doctor managed to say.  
  
It was all that was needed. A shadow fell over Clara’s face, the brown eyes seemed to have lost their sparkle.  
  
Rose had never seen her this hopeless ever before. It didn’t seem to fit to the girl she knew. But then again… What had she _really_ known about Clara? She hadn’t even noticed her best friend wasn’t human.  
  
“I know this is all a bit unexpected,” Clara explained calmly. “But try to make the best of it. I _did_ create a hole in the universe for you two, after all.”  
  
Involuntary, Rose squeezed the Time Lord’s hand a bit tighter. It was good to feel the Doctor was still there. He had gone unusually quiet.  
  
Far too quiet.  
  
Rose stepped forward through the scrunching snow as much as she could without letting go of his hand.   
  
“You did this?” she asked. “But why?”  
  
Clara sighed heavily, then that content little smile of hers returned. She grabbed Rose’s free hand and held it.  
  
“I’m just a snippet, one version. What happened, still happened, even though I’m a TARDIS rather than a person. I jumped into the Doctor’s time stream to save him. And this snippet here… Me… I was born to save the Doctor. _Really_ save him. And I think, for that, he needs you.”  
  
The Doctor raised his head, looking up to the burning sky. For a long time, he wasn’t saying anything, just staring up silenced, until Rose could see tears swimming in his eyes.  
  
“I’m so sorry…,’ he muttered after a while. “Clara, I’m so sorry, he did this to you.”  
  
But she just smiled. “Doctor,” she explained. “Gallifrey is gone. And with it, all of the Type 40s in existence, except for the one traveling with you. Believe me, if I hadn’t gotten this possibility to save myself, I’d be dead now. It bought me time.”  
  
With a nod he lowered his gaze again, looking into her eyes deeply. There were still tears glinting inside of his, though, when he took her face between his hands and rested his forehead against hers.  
  
“Thank you,” was all he whispered and Clara nodded.  
  
“Celebrate Christmas. Celebrate being together. Enjoy every second. Do me this favour. In the meantime, I’m going to spend Christmas with my family. I’ll be close, you hear me?”  
  
“Your family?” he asked in confusion and Rose noticed his voice had become hoarse. Encouragingly, she squeezed his hand once more and felt his answer immediately. Smiling, she stepped closer again.  
  
“Why do you think the TARDIS is locked, my idiot,” Clara smirked. “We ladies need some time for us, once in a while.”


	15. Chapter 15

Silence had settled since Clara had vanished once more. They were standing next to each other in a depressed mood. Tears were running over the Doctor’s face and somewhat lost, Rose stood there and squeezed his hands tightly, feeling like there was nothing she could do.  
  
The desperate helplessness she knew and hated had returned. He was a Time Lord, he was lonely and he carried the weight of infinite creatures on his shoulders and Rose knew, his pain went deeper than she could heal, than she could even understand.  
  
And yet, she cursed herself for being unable to help. Cursed herself for being weak and unimportant, never the one to give him hope or strength.  
  
The Doctor whimpered and when Rose looked into his face, she realised he had been trying to make a calming sound. She tried to wipe away the Time Lord’s tears gently, but new ones just kept on falling.  
  
Rose realised then, she hadn’t even tried yet.  
  
“Doctor,” she whispered, getting closer to him, until her face stopped close to his chest. She stepped on her toes and raised her neck up to him. With a soft but determined grip, she took his free hand out of his face.  
  
He watched her wordlessly and while they just stared into each other’s eyes for a few seconds, a tiny, weak smile appeared on his face, lighted it up like the sun lit up a long, stormy day of grey.  
  
“I’m here.”  
  
He nodded and the green eyes lifted a bit.  
  
“I know,” he whispered back. “Still my Christmas miracle.”   
  
“No, a gift.”  
  
She had to stand on her toes for slinging his arms around his neck. And so she did, while placing her lips softly on his. Hesitant at first, but she grew braver when she felt the Doctor drawing her closer and reciprocating the kiss. The first snowflakes were trickling down on them, but they barely felt them, protected by the Vortex above them, still absorbing every kind of cold.  
  
When they let go of each other, the Doctor had stopped crying. He smiled and drove one hand through Rose’s soft blond hair, leaving traces wherever he went and making her shiver pleasantly.  
  
“We should’ve done that way earlier,” he muttered with a little smirk.  
  
Rose giggled, unsure what to say. It was like kissing him had left her on a high.  
  
“You still have a sentence to finish!”  
  
Hesitant she lowered her arms and stepped back on her feet, still feeling the Doctor’s arm around her waist, from which she hadn’t even noticed it was there before.  
  
“Oh,” the Time Lord replied amused. “Almost forgot about that.”  
  
While they were leisurely wandering through the creaking snow back to the Tyler’s home, he turned to Rose with a huge grin on his face.  
  
“Rose Tyler?” he asked in a soft tone.  
  
Expectantly, the young woman chewed on her lower lip. When he didn’t continue, she looked up demanding and he laughed quietly.  
  
“Rose Tyler,” he began anew. “I…. think, your friends are coming.”  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor is such a tease. Not me of course. That's all him.


	16. Chapter 16

“Rose?” Mickey was the first who spoke, shouting already from afar to the young woman and crossed the last few steps between them running. “Rose, did you see that? The sky, the…”  
  
He stopped dead and she could practically _watch_ him think.  
  
“Who is that?” he finally asked.  
  
In that second, two young men reached the small gathering, using the snow as an excuse to not run as fast as their leader. A wide grin played around the corner’s of the older one’s mouth.  
  
“Hey Rose, new boyfriend? You never introduced us!”  
  
“Go home,” the young girl demanded without reacting to their teasing. “Celebrate Christmas. Here’s nothing to do for Torchwood.”  
  
“What?” Mickey replied. “But… the sky…”  
  
“Forget the sky, Ricky,” the Doctor interrupted him. “That’ll solve itself. I don’t know what you were planning to do to the sky anyway…,” he added muttering.  
  
“My name’s Mick…” Mickey froze mid-word, eyes stuck on the Doctor almost fearful. When he finally returned back to life, he shivered, just once.  
  
“No,” he gasped. “ _You_?”  
  
Rose took two steps towards her old friend, took his gloved hands and gave him an affectionate kiss on his cheek.  
  
“Collect your strength,” she told him calmly. “You’ll be able to lead Torchwood without me. And you’ll have to. Take a break. Go to your families.”  
  
Mickey looked at her for a few seconds, then swallowed. “Let us at least district the area,” he pleaded in a resigned tone. “So people don’t panic.”  
  
“Sounds good,” Rose nodded.  
  
Mickey hesitated for a second while watching Rose. Then his brown eyes wandered to the Doctor.  
  
“So you’re leaving again, yeah?” he asked.  
  
The Time Lord nodded.  
  
“Back to the other universe?”  
  
Another nod.  
  
The young man to their right lifted his gaze interested. “The other universe?” he asked curiously, but nobody seemed to listen.  
  
  
  
Rose’s young Torchwood team was silently watching the phenomena above them in awe for a while, then they build up a barricade to divert possible pedestrians.  
  
“And it’ll just go away? By itself?” Mickey asked for insurance and Rose nodded patiently.  
  
“Can you give us a drive home?”  
  
  
  
The drive in the Torchwood jeep was by far more comfortable than the long walk Rose and the Doctor had made before. After a few minutes through the deep, white snow, they were back at the Tyler’s drive-in, where the TARDIS was waiting for them, half buried underneath crystal clear white.  
  
Doors were slammed shut and Mickey used the moment to say goodbye to Rose.  
  
The Doctor saw tears in his eyes, right before the young Torchwood agent drew him aside into an undisturbed corner.  
  
“You’re the Doctor, aren’t you?”  
  
Curious, the Doctor’s eyes widened as he nodded. His opposite imitated the gesture, like trying to collect himself.  
  
“And you travel back with Rose, yeah? Into your world?”  
  
“After Christmas,” the Doctor confirmed calmly. “If you want to say goodbye…”  
  
“Take me with you.”


	17. Chapter 17

“Rose!”  
  
Jackie and Peter had ripped their door open and called protected from their warm and heated house for their daughter.  
  
Almost instinctively, their hands found together again, while Rose and the Doctor stepped towards the parents. They were watched with expressions that were hard to read, until Jackie took pity on them and invited them in.   
  
“Get in, you’re freezing your asses off. How crazy are you two, going out in this snow?”  
  
The Doctor hesitated, but while Rose quickly dragged him in, Jackie calmed him down in her usual lovely way.   
  
“I didn’t mean it like that, you know?” she hissed. “You could’ve just told us it’s you.”  
  
“It was quite a shock, seeing your TARDIS outside,” Pete added with a softer smile. “We thought now you’re out the door, we wouldn’t get to see our daughter again.”  
  
The Doctor felt Rose flinching at these words.   
  
Merry Christmas, the Doctor thought bitterly. I am here to steal your daughter.   
  
“We banged the TARDIS door for hours and thought, you’d fly away any second.”  
  
“That’s why Clara looked for us....,” the Doctor muttered thoughtfully.  
  
They were led back into the living room, where warmed up food and punch was waiting for them.  
  
It felt good to warm themselves up after all the time they spent outside in the cold and it didn’t take long for the comfort to drown all of the worries out on Rose’s mind.  
  
Sweet punch was running through her veins, the decorated room was pretty and familiar, and the strong arms that held her close to him more than she had hoped for.  
  
The best Christmas present her friend could’ve given her.  
  
In this second, the Doctor shattered her perfect little picture.  
  
“Who was the young man outside?”


	18. Chapter 18

“Wh… Who?” Rose wanted to know even though she already knew the answer.  
  
Confused, the Doctor watched her, then broke out into a wide grin. “You’re nervous?”  
  
“His name’s Ianto,” Rose gave back resigned. It bothered her how absolutely calm he was. “He got to our team last year. We were… ehm…” She stopped and her insecurity made her chew on her lower lip.  
  
The Doctor waited for a few seconds patiently for words that would never come, then raised both eyebrows.  
  
“You were what?” he asked.  
  
“Ianto Jones?” Jackie asked in that instant curiously, arms loaded with big slices of Apple-Cinnamon cake. “Oh, he’s a lovely boy. Just completely obsessed with his work…” She threw a glance to Pete, while serving the plates. “A lovely boy, _isn’t he_?”  
  
Pete just grumbled something incomprehensible and Rose felt heat running up her cheeks.  
  
“We were going out for a little while,” she finally explained in a low voice. “Nothing big, only a few dates. We were working together, so it wasn’t the best of ideas… it’s just… he understood me.”  
  
“Yes?” the Doctor asked intensely. “Why?”  
  
When Rose finally dared to look back into his green eyes, she realised they had remained soft. – Of course. She had always been the jealous part in their relationship and he the perfect counterpart, her puzzle piece, the one who would sacrifice himself for her every day. Together they complemented perfectly what was unbearable on its own.  
  
“He’s a prisoner in this world just like I am. He says on the other side, they take him for dead. In his world.”  
  
The Doctor nodded sympathetically. “He asked me to come with us.”  
  
“That would work, right?” Rose asked eagerly. “He doesn’t have to stay if he doesn’t belong here?”  
  
The Doctor watched her amused, but then got serious again in an instant. “He can come with us, but he needs to realise that there’s no guaranty our world is his, too. Out there are infinite parallel universes, he could come from each of them.”  
  
For a while they ate their cakes silently. The Time Lord retreated a bit to give parents and daughter some time together. When Rose started to talk about her departure, he stepped out on the snowed in balcony.  
  
It took her quite some while, but she followed him when she was finished. The Doctor could see tears gleaming in her eyes. Wordlessly, he drew her into his arms, placing his chin on her head and holding her close. Once and then he gave her some soft kisses on her hair, and she smiled through her tears.  
  
In front of them, the winter sun slowly rose, glaring bright reflected on the icy white.  
  
“It’ll happen soon, won’t it?” Rose whispered and the Doctor nodded saddened.  
  
More to break the uncomfortable silence than out of curiosity, he finally asked:  
  
“What did you tell this Ianto about me?”  
  
Surprised, Rose let go of him. “Nothing,” she gave back in obvious confusion. “Why?”  
  
“What?” the Doctor gasped. “Then how did he know of me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yesterday, while translating the last bits, I found out past Resa had a Christmas miracle in store, not only for the Doctor and Rose, but also Ianto and Jack, so yeah, here we go.


	19. Chapter 19

It began while the sunrise painted the sky into a glaring bright, wonderful and royal Gold-Red.  
  
Rose needed to close her eyes and buried them into the Doctor’s chest. It was the perfect place to have them protected and still peer to the spectacle once in a while.  
  
There were sparks which had gathered together to a glowing, golden swarm, dominating the sky now. For Rose, they seemed to embody pure light.  
  
And even though she could barely watch, she recognised the sight and felt the familiarity of it spreading through her veins. She had felt this light once before, when it had driven every fibre of her body into higher spheres. She had looked into the Heart of the TARDIS once before.  
  
And this, this made her eyes burn in exactly the same way.  
  
And then it rained gold.  
  
Spark for spark was dancing through the air, whirled around their heads, until finally, it was carried across the white landscapes by the wind, nothing but a little speckle disappearing in the distance.  
  
“What happened?” Rose asked in a low voice, and without even knowing why, she felt tears in her eyes.  
  
The Doctor’s eyes seemed just as wet, gleaming suspiciously in the light.  
  
“She can’t live without a body,” he explained in a broken voice. “And it seems she likes to leave just as spectacular as she comes.”  
  
Silent and in awe, they stood together in the rising sun and watched Clara until the last spark that hadn’t burnt out yet was dancing in front of Rose’s face.  
  
Rose had only blinked once and then it had disappeared.  
  
She could feel her heart cramping painfully, so painfully in fact, she had to arch and hunch. The Doctor was by her side, held and supported her, until her tears ran dry.  
  
“Her last gift,” he whispered with a shake of his head. “Oh, this woman…”  
  
For a while, they stayed there, standing quietly in the early morning light, until Rose broke their silence with slightly shaky voice.  
  
“We stood right here, night for night. Watched the stars together. And she said she’d travel amongst them. One day.”  
  
When she looked up, she saw tears in his green eyes.  
  
“You know,” she went on quickly while drawing him into a tight embrace. “Time Lord or not, my mom always said, every loved person who has to leave, will one day become a star on the night sky.”  
  
The first, stifled sob escaped the Doctor.  
  
“That’d explain why I saw more stars than anyone else in the universe.”


	20. Chapter 20

A bit of a chill was creeping up his arms and laid on his skin, but he didn’t say a word, not even the little sigh that was waiting for quite some while to escape into freedom.  
  
Basically, he knew it was his fault. He robbed these people of a beloved part in their circle and if any person in this universe knew how much it hurt, it was him.  
  
And yet he was selfish enough to do it. To just take Rose with him. Clara’s sole sacrifice forced him to, anyway, and he knew Rose wouldn’t want to stay here, no matter how much it pained her to leave her family behind.  
  
Ianto stood next to him, staying just as quiet as he was, staring at the scene in front of his eyes silently.  
  
Jackie hugged her daughter tightly one last time. Repeatedly, Rose was whispering her apologies, but her parents didn’t seem to want to hear it. It was Pete who was finally speaking the magic words.  
  
“Rose, you weren’t happy here,” he whispered into her ear while pressing her close to him. “We always knew. We were just waiting for him to find a way back and take you with him. You need to find your happiness.”  
  
Rose nodded with tears in her eyes and pecked a soft kiss on her father’s cheek.  
  
“Take care of yourself,” she whispered hoarsely. “And the others. Mickey and Josh and Tony and… you.”  
  
They promised her with all they had, they’d be alright and finally, Rose stepped with tears in her brown eyes into the TARDIS.  
  
It was a weird feeling. On the one hand, she was leaving her home, on the other hand, she had just found it back. And even though deep sadness was taking a hold of her, she couldn’t help but notice, something had changed.  
  
“What did you do to her?” she smirked. “You can barely recognise her anymore.”  
  
“I’ve redecorated,” the Doctor smiled, while inviting Ianto in and closing the door behind him. “Don’t you like it?”  
  
“I’m not the problem,” Rose gave back. “But I think, had _your_ TARDIS a body, she’d be shouting at you the whole day.”


	21. Chapter 21

“So,” the Doctor began. Smiling, Rose was leaning on his shoulder, let silently float the familiarity of it all through her mind. It felt so infinitely right to sit here next to her Doctor, not only seeing and hearing the buzzing and whirring of the TARDIS, but also feeling it in her whole body.  
  
It was as if she was inside of her, instead of just around her. This was the life she had missed for so long. Years ago, she had already given up on every being here again, had sunken into a hopelessness she never wanted to experience ever again.  
  
And now she was back.  
  
Happier than she had been all the last years.  
  
“Where should we bring you?"  
  
Seemingly casual, Ianto shrugged. “Cardiff, 20th century. I think that’d be alright…” he muttered and straightened his cravat with nervously trembling fingers.  
  
Rose grinned widely. “You know, you can stop hiding,” she explained calmly. “We know you know something. We just want to know – How?”  
  
Ianto blinked in puzzlement. “What are you talking about?”  
  
“She means me,” the Doctor explained. In the same second, Rose hand had shot up. A burning pain had flashed through her head and a breathless gasp escaped her. After a few seconds though, everything was back to peacefully normal.  
  
Embarrassed, she chewed on her lower lip, faking a smile, but the Doctor just laid a hand on her forehead.  
  
“Don’t worry,” he whispered, then turned back to Ianto. “You knew of me. You knew who I am, without anyone ever telling you. How?”  
  
Ianto hesitated for a second, watching them grinning at him, until he finally acknowledged with a shrug that it was too late for lies.  
  
“I… I have a friend who told me about you. In my world.”  
  
The Doctor blinked.  
  
Opened his mouth.  
  
Blinked again, until he finally dared to speak.  
  
“…. Oh no.”  
  
“And I’d like to find him again.”  
  
“Ca… Cardiff you said?”  
  
Rose almost had to laugh when she saw the Doctor’s lower lip trembling in worry.  
  
“Wouldn’t you rather… I could bring you to the North Pole. Or… or… Raxacoricofallapatorius…”  
  
“Oh, Raxacoricofallapatorius is brilliant!” Rose commented.  
  
“Cardiff,” Ianto gave back calmly and the Doctor sighed.  
  
“Torchwood hub, I suspect?” he asked with a bitter tone and Ianto grinned brightly.  
  
“Would you? Please, make it Jack’s bedroom.”  
  
A resigned sigh was the only answer the young Welsh man got.  
  
“If it’s alright for you, I’d suggest a little break first,” the Time Lord pleaded. “Rose and I haven’t slept in quite some while.”  
  
Ianto nodded happily.  
  
“One more day doesn’t matter. Not now.”


	22. Chapter 22

It hurt in every cell of her body.  
  
It wasn’t her death that let her break out into tears, left her arching and whimpering on the floor, it was the knowledge of what her death would do to _him_.  
They belonged together. She should be with him, accompany him, heal him. Instead she would expire herself to become another unreachable star on the firmament. Too far away, even for a Time Lord.  
  
“Please,” she whimpered. “Please no… no… Doctor…”  
  
“Hush,” she heard his voice, talking to her calmingly. “Rose, it’s alright. Open your eyes… open them.”  
  
And so Rose did.  
  
Bright light was shining down on her, the darkness was lifting, the pain ebbed, but didn’t disappear wholly.  
  
She looked up to the Doctor with tears veiled eyes. She would’ve loved to explain that she was in pain, that she was afraid she’d die soon, but when she saw his worried face, there wasn’t a word breaking free of her.  
  
She couldn’t do it. After all that had happened, she couldn’t steal him his last spark of happiness.  
  
“Are you alright?”  
  
She lied with a nod, afraid her voice wouldn’t carry her.  
  
“Good. Ianto wants to go now. We’re in Cardiff already.” He blinked. “Friday, 25 th of December. I thought, we’d do Jack this favour.”  
  
He was creating his own little Christmas miracle for the Captain.  
  
In spite of it all, a little smile sneaked on Rose’s face.  
  
It was one of those moments Rose simply wouldn’t buy that the Doctor didn’t feel any kind of affection for Jack.  
  
  
  
“You know,” they heard Jack’s voice the second they opened their TARDIS doors. “It wouldn’t kill you to call first. Or send me a memo. I could cook tea.”  
  
Wordlessly, the Doctor stuck his head out of the door and grinned at Jack cheekily. “And a merry Christmas to you, too,” he greeted him.  
  
“Uh, new face,” Jack gave back friendlier. “I like it. But what’s with the bow tie?”  
  
The Doctor frowned, then nodded. “You’re right. Hang on!”  
  
He stepped back into the TARDIS, closing the door behind himself. Wordlessly, he gestured Ianto to come, undid his tie and then winded it around Ianto’s arm.  
  
Grinning, he pushed open his door once more and let Rose step out first, who took the stunned Captain by surprise and drew him into a tight hug. “Surprise!” she called, which was the Doctor’s call to send out Ianto.  
  
Right in the middle of a lot of questions to Rose, Jack froze, eyes stuck on Ianto without so much as even a blink.  
  
“What… But… you…,” he whispered in disbelief, seemingly not able to even produce a clear sentence. Ianto grinned widely, at least until Jack drew him close to him and kissed his grin away.  
  
“And there’s the living proof,” the Doctor whispered to Rose. “Bow ties _are_ cool!”


	23. Chapter 23

“Let’s do something,” Rose asked while jumping nervously around the controls. “Traveling planets, having adventures, the faster the better!”  
  
The Doctor smirked. “Rose, you can sleep a bit first. I know you were still tired this morning when I woke you.”  
  
But the girl shook her head eagerly. He was right – of course – she felt utterly exhausted, but she felt like sleep wouldn’t be able to cure her, not this time. On the opposite: She was worried it would only steal her precious time, time that belonged to the both of them. At least one last adventure with him, it was all she wanted to have…  
  
But the Time Lord shook his head amused.  
  
“Go to sleep, Rose. This is a time machine. We’re not losing anything.”  
  
But the young woman still hesitated. “I… had nightmares,” she tried.  
  
The Doctor watched her in confusion for a few seconds, then seemed to understand what was going on. He took one steps towards her and before Rose even realise what was going on, he had slung an arm around her waist and led her back to her bedroom.  
  
She wanted to protest, but the second he laid her on her mattress softly, he lay down on her side, his arm still protective slung around her, head buried on her shoulder.  
Resigning, Rose rested.  
  
She was exhausted and incredibly tired and a sort of powerlessness had spread inside of her body. With the Doctor at her side, she knew she was safe, though. No nightmares would haunt her, as seemed to have been his intention. What did it matter, whether they travelled or she spent her last hours here in his arms… Breathing in his familiar scent, feeling his breath so close to her ears…?  
  
Peacefully, she drifted into a deep sleep.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas to all of you & thank you so much for reading! <3

When Rose woke up again, the pain seemed to have vanished. All that was left was a heavy memory of it, sticking to her muscles that would soon disappear soon, too, like an annoying soreness, but nothing more.  
  
Confused, she stretched her limbs and tried with all her power to hold back a flood of relief.  
  
Only now the noticed from the corner of her eyes that the Doctor was up and sitting next to her, back leaned against the bedroom wall. He watched her with an amused smirk on his face.  
  
“Slept well?” he wanted to know.  
  
Rose nodded shyly, opened her mouth to speak and hesitated then. While still trying to figure out what to say, she tried a new way.  
  
“You know what was going on with me, don’t you?” she asked bitterly.   
  
That was the moment, the Doctor burst out into loud laughter.  
  
“Oh,” she hissed. “Of course, Mr. Clever. Really funny.”  
  
“You know,” the Doctor replied with a square grin. “Sometimes you really sound a lot like your mother.”  
  
He bowed down to peck a little kiss on her lips. She should’ve pushed him away, but even while bringing up all of her powers, she had to give up and instead simply pinched his side playfully.  
  
“You’re not making it better, you know that?” she laughed. “Now tell me what’s going on here? Please?”  
  
Green eyes were close to hers but this time she wouldn’t get lost inside of them, not while she still felt yesterday’s fear creeping up on her.  
  
And suddenly she thought to see a bit of worry underneath his façade of happiness.  
  
“Rose, when Clara…” He took a deep breath, seemingly arming himself for his next words. Warm hands looked for hers and squeezed then calmingly. “This one spark,” he whispered. “That little bit of TARDIS power. It’s…. gone right into you,” he explained. “I couldn’t do anything, she decided this for you. A last gift. I don’t know if you…” he cleared his throat desperately, while Rose was staring at him with eyes wide open.  
  
“Doctor, talk to me,” she finally asked softly. “What did it do to me?”  
  
“It was just a little spark,” the replied calmly. “Not enough to make you burn up and turn you into a bad wolf,” he said playfully and she laughed quietly.  
“It caused some pain while adjusting, but nothing more. But Rose, I think… she’s made you immortal.”  
  
A short, confused blink and then there was silence in the little bedroom. Finally, the Time Lord couldn’t take it anymore. He kissed her again, then let go of her.  
  
“I know it’s… unexpected… And she didn’t ask you. And it’s a lot of pain, I know… It’s terrible and…. Rose? Rose, say something? What are you thinking?”  
  
Rose smiled.


End file.
